Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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