i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
i've created a new STD.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
