I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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