Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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