well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
