Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I believe in your delicious
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
