dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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