It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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