Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
