Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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