I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
