Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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