I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Randomize
