make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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