He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
