no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yo dont text me then not text me
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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