Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
