in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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