I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize