She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.