i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
