HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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