Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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