All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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