Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

it wasn't lemon gatorade

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(940): View more from Texas

I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears

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(740): View more from Ohio

I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.

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(206): View more from Washington

I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.

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(770): View more from Georgia

Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.

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(907): View more from Alaska

Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.

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(440): View more from Ohio

You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?

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(256): View more from Alabama

He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.

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