I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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