Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
