i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
