What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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