drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
