I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
