im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
