sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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