I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
