No, you can still breathe under the balls.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
