It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
