So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
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