Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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