I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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