So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
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