Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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