Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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