You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
