Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
