Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
