There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
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you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
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I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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