Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize