Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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