Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize