Texts From Last Night

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  (907): View more from Alaska

  is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?

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  (907): is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk? http://tfl.nu/2ehj
  Replies (26) Good night (7184) Bad night (923)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined

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  (301): I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined http://tfl.nu/iip9
  Replies (19) Good night (906) Bad night (3154)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.

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  (678): I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night. http://tfl.nu/yws8
  Replies (9) Good night (8559) Bad night (870)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Really* awful people.

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  (215): I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people. (215): Really* awful people. http://tfl.nu/94fn
  Replies (3) Good night (2807) Bad night (887)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.

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  (432): So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers. http://tfl.nu/pze4
  Replies (5) Good night (2760) Bad night (1248)
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  (654): View more from

  And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.

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  (654): And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out. http://tfl.nu/4u7j
  Replies (5) Good night (2378) Bad night (817)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?

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  (310): The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME? http://tfl.nu/y4zz
  Replies (7) Good night (2774) Bad night (708)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.

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  (336): I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat. http://tfl.nu/ctm6
  Replies (5) Good night (1732) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man

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  (914): How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man http://tfl.nu/szzb
  Replies (2) Good night (1233) Bad night (436)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists

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  (215): An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists http://tfl.nu/ypfg
  Replies (4) Good night (615) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up

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  (720): This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up http://tfl.nu/dnma
  Replies (1) Good night (249) Bad night (466)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  orgasmnado...tomorrow night

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  That's what I'm talking about

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  (616): orgasmnado...tomorrow night (1-616): That's what I'm talking about http://tfl.nu/v1ax
  Replies (1) Good night (474) Bad night (185)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust

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  (513): It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust http://tfl.nu/67aa
  Replies (2) Good night (311) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something

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  (815): I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something http://tfl.nu/de55
  Replies (1) Good night (396) Bad night (209)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic

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  (908): I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic http://tfl.nu/9xsu
  Replies (0) Good night (535) Bad night (158)

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