I hate ducks.
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed