He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize