Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
third nipple confirmed
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with